(no subject)

my love is gone for a fortnight and now i have nobody to share this thought with:
ugh, humans.
turns out the dog just doesn't get it.
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(no subject)

"but that's bullshit."
"well that's just the way it works."
"that's bullshit."
"you can't do anything about it."
"that's bullshit."

(no subject)

today i tried to catch one of these. they are fast. faster than me. i did not catch any. some people caught me on my knees trying to sneak up on one. i went back into the school and overheard kids talking about turds in public restrooms, what vegans do/don't eat as perceived by fast-food connoisseurs, and why raisinettes are good though raisins are not. i prefer the company of beetles. and i'm just fine with that - though i wish my life were conducive to that. i've got the best person i've ever known, so what the fuck do i need anybody else for? leave me alone and let me look at bugs while alyssa tells me what clade they're in.

i'm such a goddamn bore - how am i more interesting than most everybody else?

self-improvement in art.

hello livejournal aka maybe my girlfriend to whom i have surely already explained everything i am about to write

i have been thinking a lot about self-improvement and healthier eating (well not specifically for better health but that's a plus to eating roots and twigs and daily bananas) and saving the world (ok) lately and i have to turn in a pencil sketch for a class tomorrow and i had no ideas what to draw and also a few free hours so i grabbed a sketchbook and remembered that my drawing ability is severely lacking and i need to eventually change that so why not starting now?

between scribbling out a silly yardscape and the sacred burger of jesus and wet t-shirt contest mermaid i decided to do something somehow productive.

i don't know much about self-improvement but i hear that in terms of bettering oneself in terms of something measurable, it's good to keep a record of your progress. makes sense.

so, i'd need something i could draw multiple times and in different ways to actually track things - and i guess every jerk-off in art school has to draw self-portraits as often as i've had to hear when to use fucking commas - so i'm going to start a self-portrait diary. i'm self-obsessed enough, so why not?

if i keep up with it, i'll post updates here when they sporadically come into existence. if i don't keep up with it, i'm a sad, predictable, balding putz.

so here's 2/13:

obviously i need lots of work in lots of areas. that's fair for the first one, right?

i've been thinking about vegetables and fruit a lot lately since i'm working produce in a grocery store (fuck). i've also been thinking a lot about social injustice, but those ideas are less developed. also it's easier to depict a carrot than it is to depict the way day laborers are treated. ya know? ???

also, my name tag is missing an L.

i figured that i should probably have an idea as to how well i am able to represent what i am trying to draw, so i took a picture. i think the picture goes quite a ways to show how differently my perception of myself is - also it goes quite a ways to show i have an eating disorder (not really you just can't see my tits in this giant sweater):

all right here's one that's less depressing and you can see more of my squash: